A Little Bit
I have neglected this space for over half a year.
I wouldn't say I've developed in character or anything like that. Actually if anything I've felt like I've sunk deeper than I have been my entire life. Either that or I don't find it familiar anymore.
But He always listens. Run to Him and you'll realise He was there all along.
No Stranger To
He wasn’t
the kind of guy she’d necessarily look at. And by look at- find intriguing or
interesting or someone she might feel attracted to. He didn’t possess any kind
of attribute that singled him out nor did he own that aura of mystique. He was
just plain and ordinary and blended in with everyone well. The only thing she
could offer was how tall he was. In that sense, he literally did stood out.
She may
have crossed paths with him once, twice, thrice. She wasn’t sure and she didn’t
linger on it. Like she said- he wasn’t prominent enough to get her swooning.
And then
one day she noticed the stares, the glimpses, the looks he was throwing at her.
She recognized them all too well and chose to ignore all of it. She’d rather
not go through all of it again for she knew the outcome: Nothing ever happens.
She cried
bitter tears the night she unwillingly acknowledged his glances. Succumbing to
them would mean developing feelings; feelings that will turn sour and go wasted.
Eventually having to throw them away and forget. She didn’t want any of it for
the pain and heartache that accompanied this path would be torturous and the
anxiety that will mount inside her would be excruciating.
Before she
even realized, she became addicted. She longed for him to look at her more and
everytime he did, she pulled her gaze away unsure why. She didn’t recall doing
that before. She’d always bore her eyes into his. And she was determined to do
it again.
She sat on
her chair with her legs tucked under her favoring a little height in order to
see him through the transparent glass windows that separated them. Seated in
this manner only allowed the view of the back of his head but that was enough
to satisfy her. At times, she’d catch the thick black frames of his spectacles
and that tempted her to want to see more. Each time someone left the lab he was
in, she’d look up. With each passing day, the hatred toward herself grew and
thrived.
She was
aware of how deep she’s drowned herself and had no intention of floating back.
Feeling A Little Too Much Tonight
“I already said too much. I already shared too much, and I want all my secrets back. I hate getting close to people these days, I always regret sharing too much, caring too much, doing too much, feeling too much.”
It's so hard penning down feelings. It may not sound too hard. I've read so many literary work and I'm always astound with the way the authors accurately depict feelings into mere words with such precision. I admit; it is an incredible feat, something I long to excel at.
I'm in that mood again after reading a heart-moving novel. The state of the after-read is so delicate because I want to portray as much as I can how at a trance I feel, how numb it makes me, how it edges me to a brink of tears. The book is called 'Waiting' written by the amazing Ha Jin. It baffles me how he was able to pull off such a moving piece. I didn't find it similar to other novels that I read in terms of timeline. His spans over a decade but obviously he doesn't write out the happenings of every weekend. I'm not even gonna try attempting a simple review because it is anything but that- simple. It's so complex and diverse but yet revolves around a situation we may observe or hear about quite often.
I closed the book and dreaded the emotions I felt upon completing it. I've always hated this stage. I feel like this isn't something you describe, but something you feel because you can't bestow this feeling on anyone no matter how hard you try. Listening to melancholy songs does not help either but one does it anyway. I had a late dinner after and as I was clearing the dishes I started tearing up. This after-read mood is so unpredictable. It comes and goes, like waves, whenever it pleases. It washes over you during complete random times: you can be content one second and mystifyingly depressed the next. No matter how many times I try to label this feeling as 'it sucks', I just can't cos those two lifeless words does not do this heartrending feeling justice. It may just be me though.
I always end up depressed after reading. The stories books tell me sometimes just make me so despondent and forlorn. I become silent, distant and morose.
Written Haul
Greetings;
It has been awhile since I have updated any of my social media platforms. My second semester has finally come to a close- with the exception of exams- and so, let the mundane routine of staying at home doing absolutely nothing take over!
I am literally dying of boredom. Waking up at 7, I freshen up and head downstairs to find scrumptious breakfast awaiting me (I'm kidding). After, I glue myself before my laptop and remain stationary till it turns dark out. Even the internet has started to bore me. This is so dangerous cos then I'll tend to visit all the online sites and you know how that'll turn out. Speaking of which, I just got my
second(holy shit) order of my NYX lipsticks which I simply adore! All their colours are so so pigmented and it glides effortlessly on my lips. I wear my everyday-shades to school and I love how it makes me look like I hardly tried but still being able to look presentable. Those weren't the only makeup I got recently. The
EH Any Cushion was bound to be mine with the sale they were having along with
Innisfrees' No Sebum Mineral Powder. If I'm lucky my
Aritaum Full Cover Liquid Concealer and
BB Cake should just be due of delivery today. It was tough restraining myself, tempestuous I know but with those deals?!?!??! you can do no wrong.
In my previous post I did mention how I shall do a review pertaining to TBS BB Cream which I had gotten a while back. You're probably thinking I've had plenty of time to test out the product which means the review would probably be a thorough one. Wrong. I used it once and instantly hated it (including the fact I paid over $30 for it). It did no concealing or evening whatsoever. I couldn't even see the product on my face. It was literally like putting on primer I kid you not. I tried applying it a second time, this time squirting out way more product than needed. And instead of dabbing it on my skin, I rubbed it on. If you didn't know, the product will turn a shade darker if rubbed instead of rightfully patted on. I did that just to want to see something happen. Possibly having the colour of my face darken. But nothing came out of my labour (not that it was hard). It was infuriating. I vowed never to use it again. Okay, maybe one day when my skin's
a lot clearer. For now I made sure it's stored away somewhere light won't be able to reach it. Doesn't even deserve that but I'm probably helping it out since that'll probably prolong it's shelf-ware oh what the heck.
Getting Started: A Day Out
Assalamua'alaikum
I've always admired bloggers who set aside time to post about various things; be it an eventful day, their pleased outfits, beneficial review articles, tedious tutorials and other related write-ups revolving their life. Often, I find myself searching up blogs depicting the authors' interest in mainly beauty and fashion. Reading up such posts brings me temperate joy and has always been able to make me feel mildly contented. I could scroll through blogs like these for hours and read every single entry dating back for months. For a long time, discovering these types of local blogs sparked enthusiasm, ambition and a strong desire to pursue a similar platform one day.
This day, I decided to construct my once most-inspired thoughts into a bunch of sentences and share it with readers of the world wide web.
*************************************************************************************************************************************
I used to cower at donning the shawl-styled scarf thinking I didn't have the right face shape to pull it off. Having sisters with a defined diamond-faced shape, I envied at how effortless and simple it seem to be for them whenever they wore it and how they looked in it. Ask anyone mutual between us, they'd always see me bearing the square scarf on my head. I've always adored the shawl-style trend ever since it started. With its abundance of flawless ways to adorn it, their intriguing patterns and colours, the shawl scarf is a timeless aesthetic.
Imagine my absolute disappointment when I reflected upon my virgin experience on wearing it out. Everything looked horribly wrong! The outlook of my face, the folds abode my hair bun, the lack of coverage over my front and back and not to mention how I failed to notice how sheer the material was. Following that, I vowed never to attempt wearing the shawl scarf ever again and remained devoted to the square scarf. While I sulked at the sullen latter, my sisters rocked the shawl. Seeing them looking fabulous in it pushed me into YouTube-ing hijab tutorials and going on Tumblr and Pinterest for hjiab styles. My efforts were rewarded; I learnt how to achieve my personal goal of a perfect face shape along with contorting the folds rather nicely.
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The day before, all of my classes were cancelled and I made plans to go have breakfast and do a little shopping with my mum. Garnering courage, I stepped out of the house with an emerald-green shawl atop my head. To go along with the green, I opted for a black maxi dress under my Cotton On aztec-print kimono. I filled in my lips with an orange hued lip crayon from 3CE to compliment the scarf. A few dainty gold rings completed my overall look.
The two of us met and had a hearty breakfast prior to meeting my sister at H&M. We went wild there due to the seasonal sale they were having. After, we popped into The Body Shop to redeem rebate points for products my mum had accumulated from her membership spending.
Got me a few exciting bits and massively stoked to use them! Do expect a review on the All-In-One BB Cream soon (;
A Little Bit
I have neglected this space for over half a year.
I wouldn't say I've developed in character or anything like that. Actually if anything I've felt like I've sunk deeper than I have been my entire life. Either that or I don't find it familiar anymore.
But He always listens. Run to Him and you'll realise He was there all along.
No Stranger To
He wasn’t
the kind of guy she’d necessarily look at. And by look at- find intriguing or
interesting or someone she might feel attracted to. He didn’t possess any kind
of attribute that singled him out nor did he own that aura of mystique. He was
just plain and ordinary and blended in with everyone well. The only thing she
could offer was how tall he was. In that sense, he literally did stood out.
She may
have crossed paths with him once, twice, thrice. She wasn’t sure and she didn’t
linger on it. Like she said- he wasn’t prominent enough to get her swooning.
And then
one day she noticed the stares, the glimpses, the looks he was throwing at her.
She recognized them all too well and chose to ignore all of it. She’d rather
not go through all of it again for she knew the outcome: Nothing ever happens.
She cried
bitter tears the night she unwillingly acknowledged his glances. Succumbing to
them would mean developing feelings; feelings that will turn sour and go wasted.
Eventually having to throw them away and forget. She didn’t want any of it for
the pain and heartache that accompanied this path would be torturous and the
anxiety that will mount inside her would be excruciating.
Before she
even realized, she became addicted. She longed for him to look at her more and
everytime he did, she pulled her gaze away unsure why. She didn’t recall doing
that before. She’d always bore her eyes into his. And she was determined to do
it again.
She sat on
her chair with her legs tucked under her favoring a little height in order to
see him through the transparent glass windows that separated them. Seated in
this manner only allowed the view of the back of his head but that was enough
to satisfy her. At times, she’d catch the thick black frames of his spectacles
and that tempted her to want to see more. Each time someone left the lab he was
in, she’d look up. With each passing day, the hatred toward herself grew and
thrived.
She was
aware of how deep she’s drowned herself and had no intention of floating back.
Feeling A Little Too Much Tonight
“I already said too much. I already shared too much, and I want all my secrets back. I hate getting close to people these days, I always regret sharing too much, caring too much, doing too much, feeling too much.”
It's so hard penning down feelings. It may not sound too hard. I've read so many literary work and I'm always astound with the way the authors accurately depict feelings into mere words with such precision. I admit; it is an incredible feat, something I long to excel at.
I'm in that mood again after reading a heart-moving novel. The state of the after-read is so delicate because I want to portray as much as I can how at a trance I feel, how numb it makes me, how it edges me to a brink of tears. The book is called 'Waiting' written by the amazing Ha Jin. It baffles me how he was able to pull off such a moving piece. I didn't find it similar to other novels that I read in terms of timeline. His spans over a decade but obviously he doesn't write out the happenings of every weekend. I'm not even gonna try attempting a simple review because it is anything but that- simple. It's so complex and diverse but yet revolves around a situation we may observe or hear about quite often.
I closed the book and dreaded the emotions I felt upon completing it. I've always hated this stage. I feel like this isn't something you describe, but something you feel because you can't bestow this feeling on anyone no matter how hard you try. Listening to melancholy songs does not help either but one does it anyway. I had a late dinner after and as I was clearing the dishes I started tearing up. This after-read mood is so unpredictable. It comes and goes, like waves, whenever it pleases. It washes over you during complete random times: you can be content one second and mystifyingly depressed the next. No matter how many times I try to label this feeling as 'it sucks', I just can't cos those two lifeless words does not do this heartrending feeling justice. It may just be me though.
I always end up depressed after reading. The stories books tell me sometimes just make me so despondent and forlorn. I become silent, distant and morose.
Written Haul
Greetings;
It has been awhile since I have updated any of my social media platforms. My second semester has finally come to a close- with the exception of exams- and so, let the mundane routine of staying at home doing absolutely nothing take over!
I am literally dying of boredom. Waking up at 7, I freshen up and head downstairs to find scrumptious breakfast awaiting me (I'm kidding). After, I glue myself before my laptop and remain stationary till it turns dark out. Even the internet has started to bore me. This is so dangerous cos then I'll tend to visit all the online sites and you know how that'll turn out. Speaking of which, I just got my
second(holy shit) order of my NYX lipsticks which I simply adore! All their colours are so so pigmented and it glides effortlessly on my lips. I wear my everyday-shades to school and I love how it makes me look like I hardly tried but still being able to look presentable. Those weren't the only makeup I got recently. The
EH Any Cushion was bound to be mine with the sale they were having along with
Innisfrees' No Sebum Mineral Powder. If I'm lucky my
Aritaum Full Cover Liquid Concealer and
BB Cake should just be due of delivery today. It was tough restraining myself, tempestuous I know but with those deals?!?!??! you can do no wrong.
In my previous post I did mention how I shall do a review pertaining to TBS BB Cream which I had gotten a while back. You're probably thinking I've had plenty of time to test out the product which means the review would probably be a thorough one. Wrong. I used it once and instantly hated it (including the fact I paid over $30 for it). It did no concealing or evening whatsoever. I couldn't even see the product on my face. It was literally like putting on primer I kid you not. I tried applying it a second time, this time squirting out way more product than needed. And instead of dabbing it on my skin, I rubbed it on. If you didn't know, the product will turn a shade darker if rubbed instead of rightfully patted on. I did that just to want to see something happen. Possibly having the colour of my face darken. But nothing came out of my labour (not that it was hard). It was infuriating. I vowed never to use it again. Okay, maybe one day when my skin's
a lot clearer. For now I made sure it's stored away somewhere light won't be able to reach it. Doesn't even deserve that but I'm probably helping it out since that'll probably prolong it's shelf-ware oh what the heck.
Getting Started: A Day Out
Assalamua'alaikum
I've always admired bloggers who set aside time to post about various things; be it an eventful day, their pleased outfits, beneficial review articles, tedious tutorials and other related write-ups revolving their life. Often, I find myself searching up blogs depicting the authors' interest in mainly beauty and fashion. Reading up such posts brings me temperate joy and has always been able to make me feel mildly contented. I could scroll through blogs like these for hours and read every single entry dating back for months. For a long time, discovering these types of local blogs sparked enthusiasm, ambition and a strong desire to pursue a similar platform one day.
This day, I decided to construct my once most-inspired thoughts into a bunch of sentences and share it with readers of the world wide web.
*************************************************************************************************************************************
I used to cower at donning the shawl-styled scarf thinking I didn't have the right face shape to pull it off. Having sisters with a defined diamond-faced shape, I envied at how effortless and simple it seem to be for them whenever they wore it and how they looked in it. Ask anyone mutual between us, they'd always see me bearing the square scarf on my head. I've always adored the shawl-style trend ever since it started. With its abundance of flawless ways to adorn it, their intriguing patterns and colours, the shawl scarf is a timeless aesthetic.
Imagine my absolute disappointment when I reflected upon my virgin experience on wearing it out. Everything looked horribly wrong! The outlook of my face, the folds abode my hair bun, the lack of coverage over my front and back and not to mention how I failed to notice how sheer the material was. Following that, I vowed never to attempt wearing the shawl scarf ever again and remained devoted to the square scarf. While I sulked at the sullen latter, my sisters rocked the shawl. Seeing them looking fabulous in it pushed me into YouTube-ing hijab tutorials and going on Tumblr and Pinterest for hjiab styles. My efforts were rewarded; I learnt how to achieve my personal goal of a perfect face shape along with contorting the folds rather nicely.
The day before, all of my classes were cancelled and I made plans to go have breakfast and do a little shopping with my mum. Garnering courage, I stepped out of the house with an emerald-green shawl atop my head. To go along with the green, I opted for a black maxi dress under my Cotton On aztec-print kimono. I filled in my lips with an orange hued lip crayon from 3CE to compliment the scarf. A few dainty gold rings completed my overall look.
The two of us met and had a hearty breakfast prior to meeting my sister at H&M. We went wild there due to the seasonal sale they were having. After, we popped into The Body Shop to redeem rebate points for products my mum had accumulated from her membership spending.
Got me a few exciting bits and massively stoked to use them! Do expect a review on the All-In-One BB Cream soon (;
I rather my identity not be revealed. Not sure why, just prefer staying anonymous. Hijabi! I don't usually ! but there you go. I run an online store hosted on Weebly sooo for those of you kurious kittens, be sure to check out 
< Tell me on CBOX for the link exchange >